Why didn’t anyone warn me that having kids would wreck my life? All I heard was, “kids really changes things”. Um… wreak havoc is more like it! I read the books, took the class at the hospital, got advice from other mothers. But nothing prepared me for the chaos that ensues when you have to take this little person home from the hospital that is completely dependent on you; that needs you ALL the time and can only communicate by crying. Worst of all, there is no way you cannot shut it off!
When Silas turned two, things started to feel normal again. But then we had Cassia and the craziness began all over again. Moreover, Silas is now at the stage where he wants to know EVERYTHING that Danny and I are talking about. We cannot have a single conversation without Silas interrupting, “What are you talking about? Who’s that? What does that mean? Why? Mommy, talk to me!” Although we try to encourage Silas’ curiosity and verbal verbosity, it makes it impossible for us to have a decent conversation. We tell Silas, “You know kid, before you were born Mommy and Daddy actually had a relationship”.
Danny and I often reminisce about the pre-kids days. We recall times when we’ve decided on a whim to go to New York City or hiking in New Hampshire; better yet, our travels to places such as Belize, Italy, and Asia. One of our favorites was going to a conference in CA. We decided last minute to drive there from the East Coast visiting friends and national parks along the way and back. Sometimes I think we were just two kids living life together. Those were the days!
Gone are the days when Danny and I can be spontaneous and impulsive. Gone are the days when we can go out or stay up as long as we want. Gone are the days when we can watch all the rated R movies we want. Gone are the days when we can have a decent love life. In other words, gone are the days when we can continue living our self-centered existence. Kids put an end to all that. They forced us to grow up and give up our shenanigans.
So would I ever dream of trading Silas and Cassia in for those pre-kid days? Would I trade in the crazy laughter and fun they bring into my life? Would I trade the absolute joy and awe in watching them grow and develop? Would I trade those moments when I realize they are an absolute gift from God? Are you kidding? My kids’ wrecking my life is the best thing that has ever happen to me!
HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!
{ 5 } Comments
Happy Mother’s Day, Anita!! You know you luuuvvvv being a mom more than anything else! Fo’ surz!
It’s a love/hate thing. About 90% of the time I love it. But that other 10%…I”m like, “Ok, where’s DSS? Please, someone take them away!”
Hi, Anita! =) Happy belated mother’s day! hehe, I enjoyed your post.. it scares me to think that life will never be the same again in two months (I’m due July 14). We’ll see, yeah?! Hopefully I’ll enjoy motherhood as much as you do. Teach me along the way the lessons you learned in the past three years! Love & miss you very much, Jinhee
Hi, Anita,
Your descrption is very very good! I had exactly the same feeling! You said it!!
Enjoy while they are still young! Every stage will have different joy and different problems! They are always interwined! But “Joy” always outweighs “Problems”!
Love,
Mom
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Very well written piece - you sure got me fooled. You started off lamenting and I thought you will end up on the same note.
Tell Dan - with all you are going through - and by default - all that he is going through too - I sure wonder where he finds the time to pull off his technical wizardry.
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