One thing I will never get used to is being watched all the time. When we lived in Beng Trabek, our neighbors didn’t just look into our windows, they stared. When they were caught, they didn’t get embarrassed and look away. They didn’t even try to play it off by quickly glancing up at the roof as if there were something interesting up there. They would keep staring and if they were particularly friendly, they would smile and wave at Silas.
Kids would climb up the side of our house and hang onto the window bars to get a better look. They would watch what we were doing and give a second by second play of what we were doing to the rest of the neighbors downstairs listening to their reports.
When we fed Silas outside at the top of the stairs, kids would take turns coming up so see what he was eating. “He’s eating fried rice with carrots and pork!”, would echo down the neighborhood from one kid to another.
Our teammates who lived in the same neighborhood had it really bad, mainly because they are not only foreigners but are dead-up white foreigners. People would watch their baby taking a bath and comment to each other, “Wow, his balls look like chicken eggs!”
When we first moved to this small town of Kampong Cham, we thought we were getting more privacy because we live at work within a gated house. Then we realized that whenever we went out, our neighbors would somehow report to one another where we went, what we bought, and how our kids were behaving.
It’s not like we’re followed around by paparazzi, but living in a fish bowl can be really frustrating. But then we realize, “what else are they going to be talking about?” Most of the time you just see people lounging around looking at each other, the ground, the sky…there’s not much going on. So we become the entertainment.
Last Sunday was a typical Sunday. We had nothing to do and no one to see. We were sitting out on our balcony doing nothing but looking up and down the street. Danny started watching the next door neighbors build cement pillars and started commenting on them.
Danny – Check out the guy in the gray shirt. My man is bookin’!
Anita – He looks like he’s on speed or something.
Danny – Dude, he must be hot. How does he move so fast? He’s gotta be twice as fast as the rest of them.
Anita – Yeah, ten times faster than Humpty Dumpty over there.
Danny – Oh, look at Da (grandpa) trying to help. He’s going to break his back.
Anita - I think that’s the guy I always hear coughing up phlegm every morning.
Danny - Yuck!
Anita – Hey Danny?
Danny - Yeah?
Anita – You know what’s happening?
Danny – Yeah…
Anita & Danny - We’re becoming like them!
{ 3 } Comments
I wonder if that’s just the urban environment. I’ve had countless experiences of people watching at our house here, either with random roommates or tenants, w/ other neighbors, or with P or my sister or my parents. I think if you told me I’d have so much fun watching people from my house before I moved here, I wouldn’t have believed you. The other day my brother-in-law and I were playing with his kid on the 1st floor, then noticed a guy having an argument with a policeman on the corner of the street through the living room window. We watched for like 5 minutes the guy’s gesticulations and wild hand waving–he was clearly mad. I said that i bet the dude was going to offer his hand to the policeman afterwards–my brother in law said no way, no way. Then he finally did, and they shook hands–my brother in law and i burst out laughing and hi-fived. Entertainment value was definitely better than any TV episode. Then my 11-month old nephew started yelling because we’d forgotten he was even in the room.
True, people watching is fun no matter where you are. I just think it’s funny how here there is no qualms about staring and not trying to mask your comments and be subtle about it. There’ll be times when someone will tell me, “I went to the market today and the folks there said yesterday you came by and did this and that.” Sometimes I’ll be walking down the street and I’ll overhear people talking to each other, “Oh, do you know her? She goes running along the river every morning.” Or, people who I don’t know at all will shout out the names of our kids. Sometimes I wonder what it would be like for celebrities who are REALLY watched and followed all the time. I do not envy them at all!
Hey Anita! Thanks for your comments on my blog.
Yeah, I have always wrestled with the Promised Land thing, still do even now that I’m back home after so many years. So I can definitely relate to your feelings about coming back to the States. I hope it’s a really great move for you guys, but of course it won’t be perfect. I’m so curious about what God will open up for you while Danny’s in school, and what will open up for all of you once he’s done.
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